I see why now….
I gaze your way in the summer warmth At the silky peaks and valleys of your back in the sun. Deep canyons drenched in Tan oil. Hair dancing in the air… Your skin scorches with constellations of sunspots.. and the way you rest upon your strong hands as you turned to me to speak. You speak of beautiful things as you wipe the perspiration from your brow. Transfixed, I appear in the...
A presence driving you to insanity again. You know how it seems, you know. But can you- rather, do you change it? Can you?
That moment you reconsider the thoughts and actions is the moment you truly know how annoying life is…
The essence captured in the blurry magic brings back the long lived emotions I’ve suffered inside of… suffocation, self inflicted suffocation… Your presence is cellophane. Air holes boarded up… Images. I imagine.
Life is loneliness, despite all the opiates, despite the false grinning faces we...
I am once again teetering between the fine lines of depression and being ok. No strong breeze to knock me over either direction. I just hover… in the middle.. suspended animation again. My anger, my alternate self both clash, and brought for the assertiveness needed to succeed in so many different facets of life.. But the passivist in me feels betrayed, let down, and nearing regret. Only...
Settled in the whisper of each breath, Sustained in me what’s kept me abreast, Weighed down as set free to flight, Wandered the paths in cycled motions, Wash rinse repeat. Nothing stays unsoiled..
Purposely nudged into box, A tiny box, a different shape, Hidden under the lid, and holes poked for sanity. Stolen words upon foreign lips. Dancing across vocal chords. Vibrating the box with sound. Muffled, and incoherent. Stillness settles among muscles. A stretch impossible. Be still, content. accept.. You are not free.
Speaking 2 languages in a sentence because you're...
“Can I have some water, por favor?” Hahar!
Quarter Life Crisis
There is a balance in many apects of this continuance.. However the core of the earth is flickering, like a candle when it struggles to stay when being extinguished. I’ve lost my lighter, my matches moisened from the powerful storm of occular precipitation. This silent plight just beneath is kept at bay only because the balance of the rest makes it so. The options set in the foreground...
I guess it’s a nice change to have the knife in my back relocated to my heart. I woke up today truly proud for the life I’ve started to make for myself. I’ve held a job I love for longer than I have in many years. I saw myself out of a situation where I was not welcome, but my impending paychecks were. A place were people I loved spoke about me behind my back instead of to my...
OMG LEXIE! I am so sad :( Grey’s Anatomy just likes to pump out the depression… This episode was worse on the ol’ heart than Denny, George, or the shooting episodes… and now… to wait for the next season.. with a pit in my stomach! >.<